George Clooney And My Other Imaginary Boyfriends | Fetch My Flying Monkeys

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Alexander Skarsgård wrote me a love note, y’all!

By Laura On September 26, 2011 · 81 Comments

One of my readers said that I should send Alexander Skarsgård a note directing him to my blog, so I did even though I knew I risked a restraining order, and lo and behold he wrote me back (!!) because I know he felt an irresistible attraction to me, like most men do. Shut. Up.

I know to [...]

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I think I’ll frame and hang this restraining order over the mantel, next to the others.

By Laura On September 22, 2011 · 51 Comments

Look who’s madly in love with me:

That’s right Alexander Skarsgärd, also known as Eric Northman from True Blood, previously known as one of my imaginary boyfriends, futurely known as my real-time boyfriend lovah. It’s just a matter of time now; time and patience. And roofies. Lots of roofies. Oh, and duct tape. And several feet of rope. Let’s check my [...]

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For the price of a really, really nice cup of coffee per day, and perhaps a fancy French pastry, and about thirty to forty more dollars, you can help rid the world of a horrible disease. Or get me upgraded to First Class on my trip to California.

By Laura On September 20, 2011 · 65 Comments

Sarah G, a long time reader, emailed me a link the other day about September 28th being World Rabies Day because she knows I suffer from thumb rabies. This got me to thinking about how little is known about thumb rabies and how it’s like the redheaded stepchild of the foaming at [...]

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Wherein I discuss George Clooney’s latest girlfriend in a civilized, mature manner.

By Laura On September 15, 2011 · 54 Comments

According to all the gossip magazines and all of you in my comments this is what my Boo is putting his penis in lately:

They say she used to kick box wrestle in a bikini and if by “kick box wrestling in a bikini” you mean performing in a Tijuana Donkey Show, then [...]

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Alexander Skarsgård wrote me a love note, y’all!

I think I’ll frame and hang this restraining order over the mantel, next to the others.

For the price of a really, really nice cup of coffee per day, and perhaps a fancy French pastry, and about thirty to forty more dollars, you can help rid the world of a horrible disease. Or get me upgraded to First Class on my trip to California.

Wherein I discuss George Clooney’s latest girlfriend in a civilized, mature manner.

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