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Warning: Creating default object from empty value in /home/jimstant/public_html/fetchmyflyingmonkeys/wp-content/themes/platformpro/admin/class.options.metapanel.php on line 49 This happened before Christmas but I wasn’t really blogging then so I’m going to tell you now. | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
A few weeks before Christmas I went with J over to his mother’s house to decorate her Christmas tree because she’s getting on in years and I told her earlier that I would. Anyway, I first put the lights on the tree and then started pulling out boxes of ornaments and placing them on. Then I came upon a box that were obviously children’s handmade ornaments. I held the box up to J and he wrinkled his nose and said “Oh, those are ones my brother and I made when we were kids. I don’t know why mom saved them, just put them back. They don’t need to go on the tree.” His mom overheard him from the next room and said she wanted them on the tree, so I opened the box and started pulling them out and placing them on the tree much to J’s chagrin. There were some made of paper, some glittered cones, painted seashells, you know, typical kid stuff. When I got to the bottom of the box though, I started pulling out some pretty horrifying ones made from sticks and yarn that stopped me in my tracks. They looked like these:
Me: “Dude. What. The. Fuck?”
J: “What? They’re ornaments we made at camp.”
Me: “Camp Blair Witch?”
J: “No, smartass. Hmm, we may have made them in Boy Scouts.”
Me: “Troop Blair Witch?”
J: “God, you’re weird.”
I hung them on the tree next to all the Baby Jesus’ and angels I could find. Just. In. Case.
Your immortal soul thanks you – ya just can’t be too careful. You don’t know what evil might have occurred if you hadn’t done your best to glom onto as much Healing Power of Jesus as you could.
They are called “god’s eye” ornaments. We made them back in the 70′s. I still have a bunch of them too. It must have been a popular crafting project with all those hippy moms.
I am so old we actually used to go to church at public school. We walked across a field and all the Baptists went to Baptist meetings and the Catholics went to their meetings, etc. The Catholics always came back and told us how mean the nuns were and how they used to hang them from the walls. I used to be very, very glad I was a Baptist. We just sang songs.
We should not be judged by some multicultural crap we created while being encouraged by some pediphelia chasing wierdos who “happened” to be scoutmasters, first grade teachers, nuns, etc… Arghhh!! My life is ruined…….You’re evil to trot this out in front of everyone!!
We never made things like that in Boy Scouts. We hiked, or learned how to cook in the coals of a fire and took care of snakes.
All around the walls of the scout hut were aquariums filled with snakes. These weren’t the sissy small harmless snake; these were rattlesnakes, copperheads, cotton mouths and coral snakes. All were large enough to inflict a fatal bite.
I have no idea why our scoutmaster kept the snakes and probably don’t want to know.
Haha my first thought was Blair Witch much?? Talented kids though, mine just eat the paper/craft supplies/glue/cavity filling from walls
Ha! Well, you could always send them to Blair Witch Camp when they get a lil older.
Your immortal soul thanks you – ya just can’t be too careful. You don’t know what evil might have occurred if you hadn’t done your best to glom onto as much Healing Power of Jesus as you could.
Baby Jesus on the tree is powerful mojo too.
They are called “god’s eye” ornaments. We made them back in the 70′s. I still have a bunch of them too. It must have been a popular crafting project with all those hippy moms.
Blair. Witch. All I’m sayin’.
Gawd, yes. I made tons of those. Might explain something about my life…
Uh oh. The power of Christ compels you!
The yarn ones are called God’s eyes. Used to make ‘em as a kid.
Hail Satan.
Hail Satin!
My eldest brother made the 3rd one in boy scouts. No tassels… but Im sure they would have been FABULOUS!! (he’s gay, even then…LOL)
I actually like them, especially the star one! (I would hang it point up… just saying..)
Your brother’s were Flair Witch. Hail Satin!
LMAOPIMP!!!!
Puts that whole “Star of Wonder” in a different light, huh?
I know, right?!
You are wise beyond your years Miss Laura. I sure as shit would park those next to angels. Can’t have enough angels for your Christmas tree!
P.S. J, I really liked the little star made out of twigs. I would hang those all over my tree.
“You are wise beyond your years Miss Laura”
Two words: Catholic. School.
I am so old we actually used to go to church at public school. We walked across a field and all the Baptists went to Baptist meetings and the Catholics went to their meetings, etc. The Catholics always came back and told us how mean the nuns were and how they used to hang them from the walls. I used to be very, very glad I was a Baptist. We just sang songs.
The nuns just believed in corporal punishment and by “believed in corporal punishment” I mean “smack the shit out of you on the spot.”
Don’t know if you’ve seen this, yet, but; WIN A DATE WITH GEORGE CLOONEY!!!
http://www.today.com/entertainment/win-date-george-clooney-only-10-2D11883908
ENTERED.
Just curious. How much did you donate? LOL
Umm..I’d rather not say. Let’s just say I’ll have to call my accountant to shuffle a few things around.
How soon after the “date” do you think the restraining order would be files? 10 minutes?
Probably before I step into the limo- especially if they google me and find this blog.
I hope you still had some anti-Satan spray left from Halloween.
I did!
Think you had better put those back in the box and DUCT TAPE THAT MF SHUT… nuff said
I know!
Well these beat the 50 year old elves with no hands that I pilfered from my mothers tree this year – yep no hands…kinda freaky.
Whoa. Sounds spooky as hell.
We should not be judged by some multicultural crap we created while being encouraged by some pediphelia chasing wierdos who “happened” to be scoutmasters, first grade teachers, nuns, etc… Arghhh!! My life is ruined…….You’re evil to trot this out in front of everyone!!
Ha!
We never made things like that in Boy Scouts. We hiked, or learned how to cook in the coals of a fire and took care of snakes.
All around the walls of the scout hut were aquariums filled with snakes. These weren’t the sissy small harmless snake; these were rattlesnakes, copperheads, cotton mouths and coral snakes. All were large enough to inflict a fatal bite.
I have no idea why our scoutmaster kept the snakes and probably don’t want to know.
Just as long as he left y’alls snake alone, that’s all that matters.