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As if an earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear reactor disasters aren’t enough… | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura

On my drive home I turned on the radio, something I rarely do, and they were talking about Japan’s nuclear power plants still getting overheated and still in danger of leaking all over the place. “Damn,” I thought, “wasn’t it radiation that created Godzilla? I really need to speed up my preparing for the apocalypse.”


Soon I was home and as I walked in my house, I immediately knew something was wrong. I stopped in my tracks and thought “This is odd. Jack always runs up to greet me.” I quickly called out for him. He came running from the kitchen with something in his mouth. I asked him what he had and he turned and ran back into the kitchen with me right behind him. What did he have in his mouth you ask? MY ALLOSAURUS. That’s right, one of my dinosaurs! Fortunately it appeared he just got his mouth on him because the Allosaurus suffered no injuries. Thank God.


Now I think I’m going to send Jack to Japan since he enjoys destroying reptiles so much.



Jack/Godzilla


And yes, I know Thelma threw the Allosaurus down to him. She’s packed too.



Mothra/Thelma


Sayonara, you dinosaur destroying sonsabitches.

36 Comments
 

36 Responses to As if an earthquake, tsunami, and nuclear reactor disasters aren’t enough…

  1. Jennifer says:

    LMAO! OMG Jack and Thelma are Japan’s only hope!
    *** In the case of Godzilla and Mothra- yes they are. ~Laura

  2. Larry says:

    Doesn’t that just leave the ninja assassin cat? Are you sure you want to be alone with that one? You know how she sticks up for Jack, and if you put him on the slow boat to Japan…
    If we don’t hear from you for a couple of days we will know what happened. We will throw a big wake for you though.
    *** Rut Roh. Tinks would kill me in my sleep if he got wind of his…shit. And yes, party like it’s 1999- in my honor. ~Laura

  3. Heather says:

    Thelma is so beautiful! Even if she does look pissed. lol
    *** Thelma is a prety cat. She’s also very strange. ~Laura

  4. Joe the Blog Stalker says:

    Jack would kick Godzilla’s ass. Thelma would bat Mothra down then put him in someone’s shoes.
    *** HAHA! You’re so right! ~Laura

  5. Tara says:

    LOL! Thank you for my morning laugh! lol! The look on Thelma’s face is priceless!
    *** That is her normal look. Thelma stays pissy. ~Laura

  6. One Crazed Chick says:

    But Mom….she gave me a toy. I can’t be punished for playing well with the others! LOL. You know that’s exactly what Jack is saying. He’s THE man!!
    *** He is indeed THE man. ~Laura

  7. Yabu says:

    If you send Jack to Japan, you might just create a 200 foot long doxie.
    *** Uh oh, imagine that upon the earth! No cat butt would be safe! ~Laura

  8. Tink says:

    LOL! Love the CAMO Jack. Where DO you shop for clothes. I must know HA! Miss Thang,, I mean Miss Thelma is stunning, absolutely stunning!
    *** Jack has his own personal shopper. Thelma knows she’s stunning. That’s part of her problem. Ha! ~Laura

  9. Bob M. says:

    I am so glad your Dino was OK. your collection is being depleted quickly… I dont think Jack is the innocent here. Thelma is obviously helping him but I’m sure it is a conspiracy. I just cant figure out WHY! Why do they want to make the Dinos extinct again…..
    *** Because they’re murderous assholes. Ha! ~Laura

  10. Samantha says:

    I’l ltake Thelma! I saw a big moth in my hiouse last night! lol
    *** I should rent her out. ~Laura

  11. Princess says:

    Go Jack! GO Jack! Nice jacket! they wont see him coming in that, he will seek, sneak and destroy and they wont even know he’s there. oh yeah, while he is over there, do you think he could help them out, with that Nuki thingie they got going on? How is he at plumbing?
    *** He’s kinda not so good at it what with the no thumb thing. ~Laura

  12. hoodyhoo says:

    Oh dear God, I should have known I wasn’t the only one who heard “Japan? Reactor meltdown? GODZILLA!!!”… maybe we can share a room in hell.
    *** Girl, it’s the FIRST thing I thought when I heard about the nuclear plants. Mind if we decorate with polka dots? I like polka dots. ~Laura

  13. lifeshighwy says:

    Jack can go after Godzilla but please, leave Mothra alone. What will the little teeny tiny people do without their giant moth!
    *** HA! But Mothra eats big ol’ holes in sweaters! ~Laura

  14. Steph says:

    Put those 2 on a Mr. And Mrs. Smith poster and they’d look JUST like Brad & Angelina…. the finest assassins around.
    *** HA! Don’t let them hear you say that. They’re already completely bigheaded. ~Laura

  15. Jack would get radiated over there! Plus, he would be lovin’ him some fine Japanese gheisha doxies and next thing ya know there’d be some generational mutation and Japan would be ruled by super-doxies.
    Or maybe Thelma will grow. . . opposable thumbs!
    *** OH HELL. I am starting to re-think this whole Japan thing. ~Laura

  16. Boneybutt says:

    I’ll take a room with Jack. Doxie’s are extremely protective and he’s just too cute.
    *** I trust you mean a room in Hell? Just don’t decorate it with dinosaurs. ~Laura

  17. Stacy says:

    I thought of Godzilla too when the nuclear plants got flooded!!
    *** I just don’t understand who wouldn’t! ~Laura

  18. Baxter says:

    Thelma has a ‘stache.
    *** She’s been too busy throwing dinosaurs down to wax it. ~Laura

  19. Holly says:

    Thelma just looks like an evil mastermind, I bet she has her own secret lair hidden somewhere near your house.
    *** I bet she does too! Probably where the other mates to my socks are. ~Laura

  20. Jeffro says:

    Some people would text ten bucks to Japan and think they really helped out. They can’t hold a candle to you – sending your attack pets to control radiated mutants from hell. Yer Awwwwsummm!!!
    *** I really am, aren’t I? Ha! ~ Laura

  21. Jena says:

    That is one tough ALLOSAURUS! He musta threw up an invisible force shield to be able to heold Jack off until you were able to respond to his telepathic mayday he was sending.
    *** HA! Or he just found him. ~ Laura

  22. LeeAnn says:

    Jack is the new Nostradamus. A little furry, butt-licking Nostradamus.
    As to saving yourself in Jack’s absence, you can always throw Crazy Betty at the monsters. Unless she’s the leader of them. Oh. Just figured it out. Harbinger Betty.
    *** Ha! You’re probably right. And she must be busy….haven’t seen her in a few weeks. ~Laura

  23. MorningGlory says:

    Seeing Jack and Thelma like this makes me think of Pinky and the Brain. Just sayin’. Thelma totally has the power; Jack is just the flunky.
    *** I agree with ya completely. ~Laura

  24. Erik says:

    Thelma has that “reverse Hitler mustache” thing going there. She looks like she could be sizing you up like Czechslovakia.
    Watch your back Jack…
    *** I think she’s re-incarnated. ~Laura

  25. Curtal Friar says:

    Hmmm….this post reminds me of the old Far Side strip where this city is being ravaged by a skyscraper sized postman. On a hill outside of town, there’s a pack of dogs watching the monster postman on his rampage, and one of the dogs is saying something to the effect “Okay, it’s all up to us now. This is OUR HOUR!”
    *** HAHAHA! I’ve never seen that one, and yes it’s JUST LIKE THAT. HA! ~Laura

  26. rdennis says:

    Seriously? Really? After all the terrible trouble them poor people have had and your going to send that cat? Sheeesh. You got no heart girl. Them poor people have no idea what is coming!
    *** But… but she’s good at batting down moths. ~Laura

  27. Jan says:

    Woohoo! Jack and Thelma ride again! Like Butch and Sundance! Philo and Clyde! Bonnie and Clyde! Laurel and Hardy! Wait, what?
    Never mind! Go get them irradiated sonsabitches!
    *** HAHA! Definitly Laurel and Hardy. ~Laura

  28. nightfly says:

    If Thelma is the photo-negative of Hitler Cat, does that mean that she’s actually pissy-yet-good? Chaotic good, in RPG terms.
    (…that means Role Playing Game, not Rocket Propelled Grenade. I almost forgot to correct for my intended audience.)
    *** HAHA!! She is pissy but good except when it comes to trying to kill Jack. WITH ROCKET PROPELLED GRENADES! ~Laura

  29. Brea says:

    Well, you know that as good as Jack and Thelma are at their jobs, you’re gonna need Tink to take care of Hydra. That’s just too many heads for the others, I’m sure.
    But, but, then who will protect you from rampaging Bouncing Betty and the Sighing Scooter Sonsabitch?
    GOAT TIME!!!
    *** YES! I need a baby goat!! ~Laura

  30. AmyLynn says:

    WOW narrow escape for your beloved Allosaurus….
    Jack looks so sweet and innocent but
    Thelma looks very wicked.
    Is there any other way for Jack to get the dinosaur other than Thelma swatting it down to him?
    (trying to help out the poor Doxie)
    that is all
    *** There’s no way except for Thelma. She more than likely is trying to get Jack to choke on the dinos. She does not like Jack at all. ~Laura

  31. laughingmom says:

    They could be the reason that dinosaurs are extinct!
    *** I’m thinking you’re right. ~laura

  32. Powers says:

    Thelma is setting Jack up.. She knows he can not resist a good chew so she is knocking those Dino’s off to get him in trouble…. Smart Kitty. Devious but smart! Oh! and by the way. Nice camo jacket Jack!
    *** Jack loves his camo. ~Laura

  33. SB Smith says:

    Well of course we knew that Jack is kryptonite to all the dinosaur types !
    Yesiree…dynamite comes in small packages….especially those Doxies named Jack.
    *** That’s for sure. ~Laura

  34. Elphaba says:

    Godzirra! (That’s how they say it in Japanese. FACT.)
    Jack is so cute, you probably can’t stay angry at him for long (Thelma is another story…I have an ebil cat much like her). As for nuclear superheroes…besides 200 ft long doxies, we could also use some teenage mutant ninja turtles and a gian ninja sensei rat.
    *** Ha! Yeah, Jack gets away with a lot of stuff because of his cuteness. ~Laura

  35. Ceecee J. says:

    LOVE the look on Thelma’s face!
    *** That’s prety much her usual expression. ~Laura

  36. I rip out the squeekers… are there squeekers in your dinos?
    *** HA! No squeakers. ~Laura

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