How awesome is that? This couldn’t have come at a better time. I’ve been wanting to lay some major voodoo on some motherfuckers lately. Let’s just hope it doesn’t ricochet this time.
So I took my drug test yesterday. It was a disaster. I mean, I didn’t fail it, not that I know of yet anyway, I just urinated like a drunk man with no arms pissing into the wind. I was all “Shit. I know my urethra is somewhere around here. I took anatomy dammit.” But it’s not every day [...]
I hate Sunday nights because all I can think about is starting another work week and I know everyone thinks it’s all glamorous and exciting being a government assassin but nothing can be further from the truth. It sucks. But I wasn’t born rich and the whole lottery-early-retirement thing isn’t working out very well, so because I [...]
I went back to the eye doctor the other day for a follow-up on my scratched corneas. It seems my right eye is all healed but my left eye’s cornea is still fucked up. I had my chin in that head contraption thingie when the doctor looked at it and said “Uh oh.” and I’m all “What!?” [...]
