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Warning: Creating default object from empty value in /home/jimstant/public_html/fetchmyflyingmonkeys/wp-content/themes/platformpro/admin/class.options.metapanel.php on line 49 My Hypochondria | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
I think this is the beginning, folks. The beginning of the end. The Big ZA. Yeah, that’s right, the Zombie Apocalypse. Ebola brought here to America. EBOLA. I looked it up a while back because according to Web MD I had it and I was all “FUCK! I’M GONNA DIE ALL NASTY AND BLEEDING OUT OF EVERY ORIFACE AND [...]
That’s right, in all my excitement to get into the pool yesterday I literally cooked my lily-white-alabaster-Irish skin medium rare. I used 50 SPF, water-proof sunblock and reapplied it every hour on the hour and I still need to be airlifted to the nearest burn center. I think I’m going to need skin grafts and the only donation area [...]
So last week my fibromyalgia, or polio, or body rabies, whatever I had, was making me feel like shit so like I always do in time of great physical pain, I searched my medicine cabinets and the bottom of my purses for some old expired meds I could take because going to the doctor is for pussies. [...]
