About Birds and Shit.
While I was standing in the bird food/bird house section of Lowes, trying to decide if I was going to get 25 pounds of song bird seed or 20 pounds of trail seed with dried fruit an employee walked over persistently inquiring if I needed any help. This was the conversation to the best of my recollection:
Overly-Helpful Employee: “Can [...]
My Haiku for you.
Whenever I’m sad or unhappy, instead of getting loud and angry and violent, I like to express my feelings in poetry. SHUT. UP. IT’S TRUE. Anyway, I thought I’d keep this short and write a Haiku poem to express myself. To be perfectly honest I’m not very familiar with Haiku (or even the English language or sentence structure, [...]
Is this mic still on? Testes one, two, three…
A while back, while watching the news at J’s mom’s house, a report on a house fire that tragically claimed something like six or seven children’s lives came on and after it was over J’s mom laid that gem out there. I thought it was genius. I’m thinking about embroidering it on a pillow.
The Quilting “B Block.”
Me: “My friend Patty wants me to go with her to a quilters club meeting tomorrow.”
J: “You should go.”
Me: “Yeah, well, I haven’t quilted in years. And what if it’s like a quilting cult!”
J: “It won’t be a cult, Laura.”
Me: “Hmm, maybe they’ll teach me their secret quilting handshake.”
Links to Enjoy
- Andrew Knapp Photos.
- Pot Noodles.
- The Hyena Handlers of Nigeria.
- Rest in fucking pieces, Mr. Darcy.
- Wake Up!
- Hitler's Home Movies.
- Subway Surfer.
- MC Mom.
- Is Your Girlfriend a Horse?
- Now I want to go to Iceland.
- Karaoke Hitler.
- Wake up! They see us!
- How a Gas Nozzle Knows When To Shut Off.
- A Yelp Review left for Walter Palmer's Dental Practice.
- Sleeping Guy Gets Twizzlered.
- Birds in Watercolor.
- When Taunting Goes Wrong.
- Google Sheep View.
- 3 year old girl explain the complexities of childbirth in 4 seconds.
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