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This is just like a National Geographic documentary of my life this week minus any adventure, intrigue, and naked flat-as-a-pancake boobied natives with plates in their lips. Other than that, it’s just like one. | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura

I hate it when bloggers say they’ve been too busy with real life to blog so I’ll just say I’ve been too busy sleeping. In between my naps I have taken some shitty pictures with my iPhone. Did you know I have an iPhone? Well, I do and here are some of my shitty pictures from this week:

It’s strawberry season here so I made a strawberry pie. Actually, I just cut up some strawberries and mixed ‘em with some store-bought strawberry glaze and then poured ‘em in a store-bought shortcake pie crust. For topping I have store-bought whipped cream. This is a family recipe that has been handed down from generation to generation in my family. You’re welcome. I also have a fried bologna sandwich recipe if y’all want it. I keep that one in a safety deposit box at the bank.

I like pah.

One of my palm trees had a pod thingie growing out of it and I waited in anticipation, thinking a beautiful huge flower was about to erupt. I was sorely disappointed.

What the fuck, palm tree? Talk about anticlimactic.

Almost everything I own is in storage, but I did get a new glider office chair. It’s so comfy sometimes I fall asleep at m…. zzzzzzzzz.

I would marry this chair if I could.

And here’s a picture of it and a tiny corner of my “studio.”

This is where the "magic" happens. As you can see, I can't even be bothered to clean off my desk for a photo. And no, that is not an ashtray. I don't smoke. It is a glass thingie that holds pens and pencils and my toenail clippers. Doesn't everyone clip their toenails while they blog?

I technically do not have a kitchen right now. There is a huge second room and I am using a huge bar which has a bar sink in it. The bar and sink will eventually be ripped out and given to my good friend who called dibs on it over a year ago. Anyway, I have been using a Breville Toaster Oven and a Duxtop Induction hot plate to cook with and I love them. I’m pretty sure I will be getting an induction range for my new kitchen once it’s done.

Yeah, orange counters on the bar. Told you it was a 70's house. You should have seen the groovy shag carpet that we ripped out of here.

Boiling eggs like a motherfucking pro.

I needed somewhere to hang some shit so I bought a cute coat rack thingie for the back of one of the doors. I figured I could put it up myself since it was just a matter of two screws. Four hours later, after a lot of cussing, a broken nail, and a small gouge in one hand from the screwdriver, I had to get the soffit fascia guy off his ladder outside to come in and repair what I did and put it up right.

Carpentry is hard, y'all.

Hmmm. Now to end this all National Geographic-y like I promised, here’s a picture of a frog by my pool cement pond.

I get serenaded by these sonsabitches almost every night. I love it.

48 Comments
 

48 Responses to This is just like a National Geographic documentary of my life this week minus any adventure, intrigue, and naked flat-as-a-pancake boobied natives with plates in their lips. Other than that, it’s just like one.

  1. wildriver says:

    Whoa…..heirloom strawberry pie, fried baloney sandwiches….you’ll be playing kissey face with them damned frogs expecting a prince no doubt? :-)

  2. Micki says:

    Glad to see you’re enjoying your new home :)

    And I’m loving the toaster oven…it’s on my wish list now (because I need more kitchen stuff. Really.)

  3. Mark12A says:

    Toaster ovens rock. You can use one to make a BROILED bologna sandwich. All kinds of broiled shit. Keep the frogs away, though.

    • Laura says:

      I bet frog legs broiled would be good! Honestly, some killer ribeyes have been broiled in that thing. Also bakes a mean pizza.

  4. MorningGlory says:

    I have glider-chair envy now. Of course, if I had a glider-chair at my desk, I’d never get anything done.

  5. Yabu says:

    Hot sauce is also good with frog legs.

    • Laura says:

      I do love me some frog legs! And I used to frog gig when I was younger and on the farm… but I don’t gig anymore…it’s like I’ve gone liberal! Ha!

  6. Why bother with Nat Geo Mag when I have you???

    I shall forthwith subscribe to your newsletter.

  7. Shannon G. says:

    Wow, You have Staub cookware? Will you adopt me? lol

  8. Jena says:

    That hot plate is awesome possum! Love all the pics and I read all that in a female version of David Attenbouough (sp?) voice. Because that’s how I roll.

  9. Paulie says:

    Thanks for the tip on the hot plate; I’ve been looking for one of those for a while now.

    Didn’t occur to me to go to Amazon. D’oh!

    And the fried baloney sammich. Yum.

  10. Leslie says:

    Now we know where the Brady’s kitchen counters went. I too am loving that toaster oven.

  11. One Crazed Chick says:

    We could so share fried balogna sandwich recipes!!

  12. Jess says:

    No photo of Jack? Did he piss you off?

  13. Jennifer says:

    What a cute studio! LOVE the induction hot plate!

    • Laura says:

      I really am digging the studio. Very bright and cheery. That induction plate convinced me I can not live without an induction range.

  14. B. Jane Fierce says:

    I retired from cooking three years ago after I got divorced. Now, if I can’t nuke it, pop it or take a can opener to it…fuke it!
    >.<

  15. Janie Jones says:

    Oh. My. Gawd.

    We have the exact same mouse.

    We must be twins separated at birth.

  16. Nicole says:

    OMG… pah and a glider rocker and frog serenades. I am so Teh Jealous!

  17. LyleLovett666 says:

    What kind of human being talks about bologna samich recipes and then fails to deliver?

  18. Greg says:

    Palm trees are weird.

  19. MSgt B says:

    I most certainly do NOT clip my toenails while blogging.

    I bite them.

  20. Next to my computer is a humongous pair of nail clippers. Up til now, I thought I was the only one.

  21. untbunny says:

    Please do not tell me two screws and a interior door kicked your ass. Laura, you are kidding right?

    I have the same hot plate and love it. If you decide on an induction stove, check sears outlet first. They have high end kitchen items at very reasonable prices. Or you could locate an abandoned home with one and “secure” it at your place. Seeing you have great seccess locating excellence on your own.

  22. Maeve says:

    After looking at that hideous orange counter top; I will never complain again about my “almond yellow” original counter tops I have in my house.

    • Laura says:

      Thank God it’s just a bar…but it is going and the kitchen here is being completely gutted and remodeled. Slate countertops probably.

  23. SB Smith says:

    Love the Breville toaster oven. They make great kitchen appliances. That’s the most incredible single burner I’ve seen !
    However, that counter top isn’t orange. If you put an orange (the kind you eat) down on that countertop, you would see the formica is melon colored. I think it’s awesome IF I was going to have formica, that is.

    You’ve just GOT to post some before and after pics of the kitchen when that’s done

    • Laura says:

      It’s Clemson orange. The previous owners were apparently HUGE Clemson fans and this was the party room. On the other wall is a HUGE Clemson tiger paw. Ha! Seriously. It was just lucky for them I suppose that it was the 70′s and orange was in. Isn’t it Rachael Ray that has an orange kitchen?

      I plan on posting before and after pics when the house gets done. It’s all just chaos now.

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