Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura
From the monthly archives: February 2013

I will never enter another federal building unless I’m being brought in handcuffed by federal marshals, which, let’s face it, is not outside the realm of possibility.

By On February 28, 2013 · 43 Comments

The other day one of my friends at work needed to pick up some tax forms and she asked if I would go with her at lunchtime. I told her I would and thought while I was there I’d pick up a state form instead of printing it out. We went downtown to the Strom Thurmond Building [...]

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Just when you thought it was safe to start reading blogs again…

By On February 25, 2013 · 42 Comments

No, I didn’t run away and I haven’t died, though there were days I thought I would do both. My rabies keeps flaring up and I think I’m in Stage 4 renal and liver failure, but besides that, I am fine and back to blogging just in time to tell you about last night’s celebrity dream. These are the dreams where [...]

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There’s only one thing I suck at worse than routinely blogging anymore, and that’s keeping friends. Thank God I have Wilson and you guys.

By On February 1, 2013 · 97 Comments

Some friends and I were sitting around eating lunch and one of them said someone they knew with the honest-to-God last name of Cheeseburger was having a baby and they were going to name it Chelsea. All of them seemed to think that was a good baby name. I didn’t. I said if I was having a kid [...]

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