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Warning: Creating default object from empty value in /home/jimstant/public_html/fetchmyflyingmonkeys/wp-content/themes/platformpro/admin/class.options.metapanel.php on line 49 Government Math. | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
Last week I was looking through my files and discovered that in 2012 I spent just a few pennies over $10,000 in veterinarian bills. This includes all three animals’ yearlies, Thelma’s lab work, x-rays, and arthritis medicine, Jack’s bladder surgery, his spinal surgery, and his physical rehabilitation. After I tallied it all up I was all “Holy shit! And I still need to buy two doggie gates!” Then yesterday I begrudgingly went into Amazon to order the two safety gates so I could block off rooms from Jack without having to keep doors shut. This is the gate:
According to Amazon I saved $4,607.42 per gate, which means I saved a total of $9,214.84, which means I actually only spent $785.16 on my animals. I think I am going to order another one before the 31st so I can show a profit for the year.
I know what you mean about the vet bills. I know we spent $1000.00 in the month of November alone. I would be afraid to add it up for the year! I wouldn’t mind the $1000 in November but we were not able to save my sweet maltese/yorkie and I still miss her terribly. We have 5 dogs and 1 cat. Three of the dogs have to have dentals 2x yr. That’s around $300 per dental plus yearly exams, blood work, and one is in congestive heart failure and takes 5 medications/day which cost $100/month! My husband tells me that I can’t retire next yr (30 yrs of teaching) because I have to support my dog habit! So yes, I feel your pain. Maybe I need to order a dog gate to balance it out! Happy New Year!
I wonder if this would still be true if we had taken the kids to the Veterinarian rather than an MD. They’re all part of the animal kingdom after all? When I think of all the money we could have saved….
Wow! I feel like a fool. I spent $10 on my dog’s gate that I purchased from Walmart. I had no idea I could have had a $4,639 gate for the mere price of $33.29!
It’s too bad your savings negated most of your cost for this year eliminating that tax deduction for medical expenses for your son, Jack. Have you remembered to order a social security number for him for tax purposes?!
Dang, at first I was all jealous that you can order a step-over gate since you have a smaller dog than my medium-sized hairball. Then I thought, hell, I wonder how much I can save on a full-size gate?? Probably like fifteen grand! If I order three or four, I can live off the profits, right??
I almost bought the Gates of Hell on EBAY the other day from some merchant named Lucifer. The deal fell through, however, ’cause I couldn’t figure out how to transact my soul through PayPal.
You’re just like me where my fur babies are concerned. I’ve always said that they get better health care than I give myself and they are worth every penny! Happy New Year to you, Jack, J, and your wonderful menagerie! May 2013 bring you the enjoyment of disposing of zombies/bunch of bitches using your amazing voodoo skills, great places to bury the dead hookers in your trunk, and a lifetime supply of circus peanuts and gin!!!
Had to laugh at Carrie’s comment… don’t EVEN get my family started on using dead bodies as a unit of measure for trunk space… The gate I need would be at the sewing room door to keep 5 kids, 4 cats and one husband out of… but then I’d have to figure out how to feed them through the gate… I HATE logistics and math… oh, and TAXES!
I swear I’m going to get that pet insurance with our next dog. I don’t even dare add up what we’re paying for meds for our old lady dog these days. She’s totally worth it, but now I’m thinking I should grab me a gate or two just to defray the cost of her meds. I usually hate all things math, but you’ve made it simple and fun. Mwah!
Among your many other talents, you certainly haz mad shopping skilz!
And my math is pretty good!
WTF?
I just pulled it and and YES you did save that much!
http://www.amazon.com/Walk-Over-Wooden-Gate-30-44/dp/B000CMJTBM/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1356698997&sr=8-1&keywords=walk+over+wooden+gate
I told you. Hell, I even showed you! Ha!
But it’s the same savings if you are NOT a Prime member!
Yes.
I know what you mean about the vet bills. I know we spent $1000.00 in the month of November alone. I would be afraid to add it up for the year! I wouldn’t mind the $1000 in November but we were not able to save my sweet maltese/yorkie and I still miss her terribly. We have 5 dogs and 1 cat. Three of the dogs have to have dentals 2x yr. That’s around $300 per dental plus yearly exams, blood work, and one is in congestive heart failure and takes 5 medications/day which cost $100/month! My husband tells me that I can’t retire next yr (30 yrs of teaching) because I have to support my dog habit! So yes, I feel your pain. Maybe I need to order a dog gate to balance it out! Happy New Year!
Order a couple!
Still cheaper than a child.
True dat.
Oh hells yeah!
I wonder if this would still be true if we had taken the kids to the Veterinarian rather than an MD. They’re all part of the animal kingdom after all? When I think of all the money we could have saved….
I’d rather have vet bills.
Wow! I feel like a fool. I spent $10 on my dog’s gate that I purchased from Walmart. I had no idea I could have had a $4,639 gate for the mere price of $33.29!
It’s too bad your savings negated most of your cost for this year eliminating that tax deduction for medical expenses for your son, Jack. Have you remembered to order a social security number for him for tax purposes?!
LOL! Happy New Year Laura!!
Happy New Year! I wish I could claim them at tax time!
You are right about still being cheaper than a child, and often a lot more fun.
And less mouthy.
Clearly, you have not met our pets. They never shut up.
My parrot will bust an eardrum when someone rings the doorbell.
Totally worth it!
For reals.
Get to ordering…by the way, how’s Jack doing?
He’ s doing great! Spoiled rotten is all.
Dang, at first I was all jealous that you can order a step-over gate since you have a smaller dog than my medium-sized hairball. Then I thought, hell, I wonder how much I can save on a full-size gate?? Probably like fifteen grand! If I order three or four, I can live off the profits, right??
Right!
Nothin like a spoiled pet. They are so lovey and cuddly and they HOG THE BED, pester the crap out of you. Yep….don’t I know it…..all worth it….
Worth every penny of it.
Excellent accounting and I’m sure Jack is a wonderful tax deduction. He’s definitely a good reason to celebrate tiny families in my book.
He is indeed.
I approve of these math skills. And you said you were only a government assassin…
Well, I don’t like to brag too much. Ha!
Yeah, my dog would be over the top of that gate in half a second flat.
Jack is a little guy with 1 inch legs, so it works.
Looks like Zooey Deschanel modeling that gate.
Oh it does!
Beats looking for modelling jobs hands down!
It does at that.
I guess you can now add “budget scientist” to your resume. Congratulations!
Thanks!
I almost bought the Gates of Hell on EBAY the other day from some merchant named Lucifer. The deal fell through, however, ’cause I couldn’t figure out how to transact my soul through PayPal.
Happy New Year to you and the gang!
GHG
Ha! Happy New Year!
I’m pretty sure Ebay has that on a FAQ page.
Math ain’t your friend, but gin is.
Have a Happy New Year, and blessing on you and yours!
Happy New Year!
Worth. Every. Penny.
Definitely.
You’re just like me where my fur babies are concerned. I’ve always said that they get better health care than I give myself and they are worth every penny! Happy New Year to you, Jack, J, and your wonderful menagerie! May 2013 bring you the enjoyment of disposing of zombies/bunch of bitches using your amazing voodoo skills, great places to bury the dead hookers in your trunk, and a lifetime supply of circus peanuts and gin!!!
Thank you! I hope they all come true. And Happy New Year to you!
Had to laugh at Carrie’s comment… don’t EVEN get my family started on using dead bodies as a unit of measure for trunk space… The gate I need would be at the sewing room door to keep 5 kids, 4 cats and one husband out of… but then I’d have to figure out how to feed them through the gate… I HATE logistics and math… oh, and TAXES!
Carra, NOT Carrie. (Sorry… I also HATE typing as I’m obviously not very good at it either)
Just electrifiy it and let them feed themselves. Ha!
For four grand, I’ll make you a deluxe doggy gate out of the finest tropical hardwood and use solid brass hardware. I’ll even include shipping…
Sounds like a bargain.
I swear I’m going to get that pet insurance with our next dog. I don’t even dare add up what we’re paying for meds for our old lady dog these days. She’s totally worth it, but now I’m thinking I should grab me a gate or two just to defray the cost of her meds. I usually hate all things math, but you’ve made it simple and fun. Mwah!
I try to make things fun, even if they are inaccurate.
And yes, they are totally worth it.
Take that extra money you earned buying stuff and head to McDonald’s…
http://imgur.com/gallery/2Tnyu
Happy New Year!
HA! Hell’s yeah Micky D’s here I come!
You’ve named your pets with ‘human’ names (except for Tinks) so you should be able to use them as deductions. Says me.
Happy New Year!!!
As long as you say so.
Happy New Year!!
This makes more sense than any of that Fiscal Cliff crap.
I should have been elected president. Just sayin’.
And yet they say there is no truth in advertising. Shame on them! Look what they are missing…Buy enough of these and you could have a free house!!
I already have!
Wow, I’m impressed with your math skills. You could solve the national economy if you got enough stamps.
I know!!
I’m assuming your assassin duties are taking all your time. I’m, also, assuming my enemies haven’t scratched up enough change to hire you.
HAHAH! Umm no, they haven’t.