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Huzarensla | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura

 

I have a friend named Anna who introduced me to this Dutch dish. It’s one of my favorite salad dishes of all time. She also told me one of my favorite stories of anyone’s childhood EVER. Both of her parents are from Amsterdam and came to live in South Carolina the year she was born. Anna’s father was an anesthesiologist and was gone all of the time. Her mother was a stay-at-home mom so Anna got to spend all of her time with her mother. Anna’s mom was very lonely for Holland. When Anna reached school age, her father told her mother that Anna could not stay home but had to go to school. The first day, her mom dressed her up in a fancy little dress and patent leather shoes and walked her to school. She handed her over to the teacher and left. That afternoon, when Anna’s mother came to pick her up, the teacher said she needed to talk to her. The teacher said “We think Anna’s retarded.” You see, Anna’s parents forgot to teach her English, and her teacher failed to recognize that Anna was speaking Dutch. So her parents taught her English IN A WEEK and sent her back to school where she excelled. Today Anna is a medical doctor, but to me she will always be my retarded friend.

 

P.S. The recipe I linked to is the closest that comes to the one Anna gave me. I use more apples. It’s a great recipe for your leftover pork tenderloin, or even with no meat at all. Along with my crappy pic up there, I put a translator thingy on it so when you make it for your family, or for the company picnic, you can announce like an expert the proper name of the dish. Then everyone can call you retarded behind your back.

51 Comments
 

51 Responses to Huzarensla

  1. Playin'Posse says:

    They said my husband was retarded too! Turned out he was very hard of hearing and needed hearing aids. Kinda makes ya wonder who the true retards are

  2. MayBea says:

    Ummmm.. It’s pink….what makes it pink? I dont know if I could eat pink!

  3. Tad says:

    That was a hysterical story. I cant believe they said that to her parents and the parents are thinkin. Yeah, who’s retarded here?

  4. Tink says:

    I thought I was your retarted friend!

  5. My siblings and I all went to the same Catholic school in the Bronx. After several years there, my brother, the youngest, was struggling. The prinicipal called my mother intonher office and told her that my brother was retarded and needed to be placed in an institution. My mother looked right at the nun and said, “Fuck you, Sister.” She had my Dad enroll my brother at another Catholic school that was close to his work. There, the little Italian nun who was the principal looked at my brother, and pronounced, “He’s-a a good-a boy. We no gonna have no-a trouble.”

    And they didn’t.

  6. Holiday says:

    Wow, I guess she showed them. HA!

  7. BeezNeez says:

    I have listened to that clip a gazillion times and I still think Im saying it wrong…I know I am. More Coffee!

  8. ProblemChild says:

    English in a week.. Wow! That is awesome.

  9. Mr. Bingley says:

    You had me at “gherkin”

  10. That’s a great story, and a nice tribute to a good friend.

    BUT HAS SHE CURED YOUR RABIES???? :D

  11. Jena says:

    Ha ha! Only you, Laura would jump on the “retarded friend”! LOL

  12. Princess says:

    It sounds so fricken yummy. I love me some BEETS!

  13. Yabu says:

    I’m all about leftovers. Who shot and shot.

    Sounds good to me.

  14. Alison says:

    When I saw the title for this post, I thought you had had a seizure on the keyboard. I’m glad to know it’s only Dutch food.

    (PS One of my favorite memories of my trip to the Netherlands is my friend cracking up over a sign advertising “Contakt Lensen.” It was like they were only pretending they speak another language there.)

  15. lotta joy says:

    Since I doubt the intelligence of most doctors, I must now ask each of them if they are friends with you.

  16. Liz says:

    I was going to look at the recipe but it has beets? YUCK!

    PS – Your retarded doctor friend sounds cool. I don’t think I could learn a new language in 10 years, let alone a week (even as a child). Maybe I’M retarded! HA! :-)

  17. Jena says:

    HOLY SHIT! That drama queen was really you, wasn’t it?!!

    That little shit!

  18. Mark12A says:

    One of my old girlfriends was a real tart, but she got saved or some silly shit like that. When she came back to the dark side I guess that meant she was “re-tarted”.

    Meh. You’re not giving me much to work with on this blog. I was hoping to stay away from the finger in the dike thing.

    Maybe I should just work instead.

    Nah.

  19. Nicole says:

    Awesome story. Too many things in the salad that don’t appeal to me, but it is pretty and I like the idea of meat in a salad. :)

  20. Jennifer says:

    Yummmm I’m going to have to try this!

  21. Karen says:

    My grandma used to make this dish. She was Dutch. It is delish.

  22. What an adorable story. When I got to Hometown and speak French, they look at me like I’m demented.

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