2012 January | Fetch My Flying Monkeys

Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives

— Laura

From the monthly archives: January 2012

Australia tried to assassinate me.

By Laura On January 31, 2012 · 63 Comments

Sunday night I got very sick. It felt like my liver and pancreas had both exploded at the same time. At first I thought it was the booze, but then I remembered I hadn’t been drinking! (I know, right?!) I was becoming concerned and thought about driving myself to the hospital, but I knew I’d never make it. I [...]

Continue Reading →

I was told that before I could cage fight debate Obama I had to debate the Republican candidates.

By Laura On January 27, 2012 · 72 Comments

I’ve been busy politickin’ and by “busy politickin” I mean “drinking lots of gin and tonics and planning my debate strategy.” In case you’re wondering, my friends and I have been running in Shandon every morning, hungover but still hell-bent on vigilante justice. There has been no wiener-whacking perv sighting, but we may or may not have seen a [...]

Continue Reading →

More proof that J is a freedom-hating Nazi.

By Laura On January 25, 2012 · 70 Comments

Me: ”I have to get up early this week. Richelle, Dee, and I are going to start running in Shandon in the mornings.”

J: “Why in Shandon? That seems out of the way for all three of you.”

Me: “A naked man has been spotted there several times. Apparently he drives around naked [...]

Continue Reading →

J has always said he views it as his responsibility to mankind to make sure I never have any political power whatsoever. I’ll have that motherfucker imprisoned right after the election.

By Laura On January 23, 2012 · 118 Comments

Since announcing my candidacy for President of the United States on Thursday I have been on the campaign trail and by “been on the campaign trail” I mean ”drunk.” While on the campaign trail I announced that George Clooney will be my VP, and by “VP” I mean “sex slave.” It’s a hard life in the political limelight, knowing [...]

Continue Reading →

12 3 4 Next »

Links to Enjoy

Moth.

BIRDS!

Andrew Knapp Photos.

Pot Noodles.

The Hyena Handlers of Nigeria.

Rest in fucking pieces, Mr. Darcy.

Rescued!

Wake Up!

Hitler's Home Movies.

Adopted!

Subway Surfer.

MC Mom.

Is Your Girlfriend a Horse?

Now I want to go to Iceland.

AYA!

Karaoke Hitler.

Wake up! They see us!

Wasted.

How a Gas Nozzle Knows When To Shut Off.

A Yelp Review left for Walter Palmer's Dental Practice.

Sleeping Guy Gets Twizzlered.

Birds in Watercolor.

When Taunting Goes Wrong.

Google Sheep View.

3 year old girl explain the complexities of childbirth in 4 seconds.
Blog Calendar
January 2012

M T W T F S S

« Dec Feb »

1

2 3 4 5 6 7 8

9 10 11 12 13 14 15

16 17 18 19 20 21 22

23 24 25 26 27 28 29

30 31

Australia tried to assassinate me.

I was told that before I could cage fight debate Obama I had to debate the Republican candidates.

More proof that J is a freedom-hating Nazi.

J has always said he views it as his responsibility to mankind to make sure I never have any political power whatsoever. I’ll have that motherfucker imprisoned right after the election.

Links to Enjoy

Blog Calendar

My Flickr

Archives

Friend me on Facebook!

Follow me on Pinterest!

Categories

Search

January 2012
M	T	W	T	F	S	S
« Dec				Feb »
						1
2	3	4	5	6	7	8
9	10	11	12	13	14	15
16	17	18	19	20	21	22
23	24	25	26	27	28	29
30	31