J called me the other day and asked what I was cooking for dinner because I’m a damn good cook and he’s always trying to get a meal. I really didn’t want company at the time, let alone cook, and I was very busy cleaning my house (read: lying on the couch watching Teen Mom: Season 2 and eating Cheetos.) I knew I had to think quickly so I said I was making a Potted Meat Casserole. He was all “A WHAT?” So I repeated myself, all serious and shit, and he said “What’s in it?” I said “Potted meat of course” and he was all ”And what else?” Without missing a beat I immediately replied ”Refried beans, crackers, canned corn, and sour cream amongst other things. It’s pretty good, I mean, if you like potted meat and beans.” He was all ”Uh, no that’s okay.” Then I said I had to go open the potted meat and get to bakin’ and when he hung up I wiped my Cheeto dust coated fingers on the leg of my sweat pants and turned the volume back up on the television. I really should write an instructional book for single women.69 Comments
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You really should write that book, and include a chapter on “how to get a man to take you out for dinner”.
HAHA! But Teen Mom was on! HA!
You’ve been hangin’ out with Papa Chester, haven’t you?
Pappa Chester is one of my favorites!
What the Hell is “Potted Meat”? GaG!
The thing is, NO ONE knows what Potted Meat is.
I heard that potted meat is chicken faces and pig anuses. I don’t know, but it makes a fairly decent sandwich when you add mayonaise and boiled eggs.
Mayonaise makes everything edible, even pig anuses. Fact.
Wow, potted meat casserole. You’re good on the spot!! Poor J, he just wanted a good meal.
Why is everyone all “poor J!”? Teen Mom was on!
Yes, You should write a book for single women who actually want to STAY single. I’d read it. I’ve been sucked in twice and I have said.. both times… “What the hell did I just do”?
I should hold seminars.
Now I’m imagining a big conference room filled with couches with bags of Cheetos on them. I think you could make millions.
How cool would that be?
With that ingredient list I would have said “I’ll be right over.”
And of course you know that I will make that this weekend…
OH MY GOD YES! And have victims, err, dinner guests over!
OH, and PLEASE top it with sardines. That’s how they do it on The Food Network.
LMAO!!! I would buy your book!!
I would sell it to you. I’d autograph it for free though.
You definitely missed the boat child.. you are multi talented in so many area’s and yet, you chose to be an assassin. by the way I really do have a list if you have the time..
You got the money, I got the time. Ha!
Yeah, what the Hell IS potted meat? did you make that up? and dont tell me you get it at Publix either. Poor “J”. He’s a hungry man.
It’s right next to the Vienna Sausages and Spam.
In the “Mechanically Separated Meat” aisle.
*sniff* Just like Mom used to make.
HAHAHA! Oooo childhood memories…
Being from the South, I’d have used creamed corn, dill pickles and a dash of hot sauce… just sayin’.
Yeah, but I have those Ohio roots so I chose regular canned corn.
Sad thing is, I don’t think Mrs. Who is lying or even stretching the truth a little. Try broiled (or was it BOILED) liver… I only dare eat at MIL’s house when I’m certain it’s FIL that’s done ALL the cooking!
Ha! Boiled or broiled liver- I don’t know which one sounds worse.
So… does this mean you still have some Potted Meat Casserole left over?
My curiosity forced me to look up potted meat. Originally, it was a method of preserving meat by pouring the fat around the meat and pressing it into jars…Yum!
Today, it’s chicken faces, pork anuses, beef hearts, turtle feet, gazelle intestines and salt…..yeah, I made that part up, although I have tasted the faint taste of turtle feet in my sandwiches.
There are recipes, although the best is probably just eating it on crackers when hurricanes cut the power.
Yum. You make it sound very appealing. Ha!
Darn-it, now I’m craving turtle feet!!!
LEAVE THE TURTLE’S FEET ALONE! We can’t be having stumpy turtles running around everywhere.
Well… they wouldn’t be running…
Hmmm….Potted meat….useful for and in:
Meatballs – easy to shape and holds form fairly well.
Throw in some minced peppers, onions, and garlic, and tell everyone you made ‘bean dip’
Potted meat and lentil soup
Potted meat mayo spread
Throw in just enough shredded cheddar to affect the color and texture, add chopped pecans, and tell everyone you made ‘cheeseballs’
Oh, and by the way, I know what potted meat is made of and contains, and the shock value when you tell someone the ingredients as they’re taking a bite is priceless.
Is it tripe?
There is tripe, yes…there’s also beef hearts…but the real kicker for me was the
partially defatted cooked pork fatty tissue
partially defatted cooked beef fatty tissue.
Mmmmmm don’t forget all the sodium! Now I’m hungry…
I think you need to write a cookbook. A potted meat cookbook. I’m pretty sure yours would be the only potted meat cookbook out there, so you’d have a monopoly on the potted meat cookbook market, and you would probably become a billionaire. Probably.
Or committed, as in an asylum. Where they’ll probably feed me potted meat and vienna sausages.
I would seriously eat that casserole. Also, the next time I want to call someone a name, I’m going to call them an asserole!
HAHAH! With those French’s Fried Onions on top.
I’ll be hanging out with Hoody Hoo eating some leftover Potted Meat Casserole.
When you write that cookbook for single women, make sure to leave 2 pages for the chapter on what single men make for dinner.
Microwave meals I would imagine.
Potted meat, refried beans, crackers, canned corn, and sour cream amongst other things…..sounds like something you’d find in the last pouch of MREs after the rest of the troops had picked out the semi-edible Meals Rejected by Ethiopians.
I would have killed for potted meat and crackers when I was out in the field.
I remember making sure to throw a few cans of Vienna Sausage in my rucksack before going on an FTX.
Reading your post today gave me an idea for a new post at my place. Thanks for the inspiration!
I read this entry to my sister who is also a single woman. She got a faraway look on her face and said “potted meat casserole…”
I shudder to think what she will come up with. All I know is that hot dogs and hot dog buns can both be bought in packages of eight, so I won’t have to eat at her house.
Hahaha! Just about the same ingredients is in hotdogs by the way.
All I have to say is yummmmmmm, Cheetos! No comment about the potted meat because I know nothing of Southern culture. I’m sure it’s delicious in it’s own special way.
I do loves me some Cheetos.
OMG, you have to put Cheetos in the casserole and on top of it!!!
Gordon Ramsey, save me!!! If Leif sees this post it will be off to the market for potted meat casserole fixins. Be careful where you aim your deception and misdirection.
HAHA! You should make him one!!
Oh no! He’d eat it, love it and then it would be potted meat casserole all the time. *Ughhhgbl* And that, by the way, is the sound of my senses and my G.I. tract shuddering in revulsion in unison.
STOP DEPRIVING YOUR CHILD!! HAHAHA!
Had you told me that, I’d have still come over just to eat sour cream. That stuff is white gold.
I do loves me some sour cream.