Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura
I think the rabies went into my eye. My eye hurts. How weird is that? I googled it and the pics were so fucking gross of eye diseases that I closed it down and am just going with the rabies thingy again.
Oh, and because people seemed to like the pissed off sock monkey that I make, I have decided that I will have another Zombie Survival Giveaway and one of the pissy monkeys will be part of the giveaway. I’m thinking maybe Day of the Dead (November 2) will be the giveaway date unless I do it sooner. It depends how my rabies progresses I suppose.
And I know no one is reading this because you’re all out having fun, laughing and drinking wine with your pinkies in the air pretending your date is interesting, but I want some book recommendations. I want to get an audio book because not only do I have just one good eye due to ocular rabies (I made that up-I should be in charge of naming diseases) but I’m too lazy anymore to even turn pages. So if ya’ll know any GOOD books, let me know. I like any good story-just no fucking romance. God. I HATE romance stories. So, if you recommend a romance novel I will fucking hunt you down and stab you. I hate biographies too. No one is that interesting to me to warrant a full book. If you recommend a biography I will hunt you down and punch you in the throat. I also dislike mysteries. Non-fiction is kind of boring too. If you recommend a mystery or a non-fiction I won’t hunt you down, but you will be dead to me. So let’s just say I like horror okay. Just horror. Good horror.
Also, there will be blogging this weekend. Dogette and I have started a campaign to end this “I don’t blog on weekends because I have a life and I am busy being a fulfilled human being.” bullshit. People, you are not fooling anyone.
So, to wrap it up, I have rabies in my eye, there will be another giveaway with a monkey involved probably on a Mexican holiday because I’m worldly like that, and I need a scary book to listen to because turning pages takes too much energy, and you people need to blog on weekends like the cool people do.
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13 Responses to Because entry titles show up on search engines- CALL ME, GEORGE CLOONEY
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You tell ‘em, girl. I will be blogging this weekend, too, like I always have, because I just don’t like going with the crowd. George Clooney reads blogs all weekend, you know.
Nope, no pinkie in the air, just drinking directly out of the bottle…. Ya know, it might be wise to get that eye checked, you’ll probably have to get a shot in it or something cool like that.. if so we want pix’s.
Audio horror… I read horror but I can’t say anything I like is in audio. The Mist was pretty good on audiobook, but that has been several years back – no idea if it is still available anywhere.
Bitch, that is my sock monkey!
Day of the Dead would be a great day for a Zombie Survival Giveaway.
Will there be a drawing? How do we become eligible for the Angry Monkey? I want one! I gotta know!
Horror, huh?
The last creepy-but-riveting book I read was “The Ruins” by Scott Smith.
That’s what I’m hoping for Dogette. Call me, George.
Gargs- when did I promise you a pissy monkey? If you can present evidence, I will make you one.
Thank you all for your concern over my eye. Especially you Doni.
The giveaway will probably be like the last one- just a matter of leaving a comment to enter, and a random generator will pick the winner(s). It’s as honest as I can get. Unless there’s other suggestions. I am open to any and all suggestions of running a fair game.
Definitely scariest book ever written was Fried Green Tomatoes with a tie for second between Terms of Endearment and Beaches.
Sorry, I can’t do audio books. I believe I have bubonic plague in my ear. Then again, it could be just a shitload of gross wax.
You fine folks don’t understand Laura. She wants horror, but horror for her isn’t like horror for most folks. I recommend anything by Dr. Benjamin Spock or the American Academy of Pediatrics showing natural childbirth.
Proof the Monkey is mine
http://bitsandpieces.us/2008/08/07/big-monkey/
Re – your eye thingy. You could wear an eye patch and do the whole pirate thing. Arrh! You could even make the scary neighbor walk the plank!
Have the giveaway sooner! I want to win that monkey too!