My future’s so bright I gotta wear SPF40 or buy a silencer

I gave in and joined Facebook months ago. Hell, I don’t remember when. I think I told you all that’s how Nick found me after losing my contact info FOR OVER SIX YEARS. I joined Facebook with hopes of hearing from people back home in Kentucky where I went to school. Since joining, I of course was reconnected with my friend Nick, and have had a few people from my high school add me as a friend. It was a small school and I don’t even really remember half of them. I smoked pot and drank really cheap wine back then so maybe that has something to do with it. But that’s neither here nor there.

A few weeks ago I got an invitation in my email alerting me that I had a “Friend Add” from Laura ***** (my last name). I thought it was some kind of Facebook glitch so I went to delete it but decided to click the “View Profile” link. Well, there was Laura *****, early twenties with long red hair. The profile was legit and she had over 100 friends of other twenty somethings added. Well, I thought, at least this Laura is popular. So I looked around her profile, but then decided to get on with my life and closed it. A few days later there’s another “Friend Add” from Laura *****; the same one. It got me to thinking. Maybe this is ME from the future trying to warn ME now. Sure that Laura is younger looking, but maybe in the future they’ve perfected plastic surgery and personalities and we all look twenty something and are popular. Hey, it could happen. What if she wants me to kill someone? You know, for the betterment of mankind, to change the future. (Fingers crossed for that one.) Or maybe she just wants me to use a better hair conditioner or stronger SPF sun protection. So I added Laura ***** and sent her back a message. It read “Please, please tell me we have killer robots to do our bidding there.” I haven’t heard back from her yet.

* Don’t forget to enter THE ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GIVEAWAY EXTRAVAGANZA!

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