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Photo Challenge- One of the Scariest Things You Own | Fetch My Flying Monkeys
Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura


Pistol


The photo challenge this week was to take a picture of one of the scariest things you own. I was going to photograph some leg warmers I own, circa 1980, but I couldn’t find them. Then I remembered I had a Lady Epilator somewhere. That’s a device that RIPS out unwanted hair-PAINFULLY. But I couldn’t find that either. So I picked the scariest thing I had handy. This is the .38 Special that I have beside my bed. I don’t particularly find it scary, but I know other people do. Or maybe it’s the fact that I actually own weapons that would scare the hell out of some people. I don’t know. But rest at ease folks. I’m trained, licensed and even have medals and ribbons in marksmanship. I am also not one bit afraid to use deadly force if it is called for. Yeah, I may cry like a baby when I cut my finger dicing potatoes or even on some of those long distance commercials, but I will fuck your shit up for real if you were to break into my house. Now, by YOU I don’t mean YOU the reader. I mean YOU the intruder. I will empty this into you, reload, and empty it again. Then I will bash your head in with a lamp before I step past your carcass and exit the area. When I am standing in front of the judge and he asks me why I used such excessive force, I will tell him that I had watched too many horror films and know that when you walk past the body is when you get grabbed, so I was just making certain you were no longer a threat. And I’ll probably shed some tears to help my case. I’ll just think of one of those ‘away from home at the holidays’ commercials.

4 Comments
 

4 Responses to Photo Challenge- One of the Scariest Things You Own

  1. J says:

    Frankly I think your .44 Magnum is scarier.
    Also, I really do want you on my team in case of zombie warfare. I know for a fact you’ll make all the head shots.

  2. richard says:

    Makes all the head shots huh?
    ummmmmmm
    Guns are cool, have owned them for years and occasionally even go shoot them.
    What part of Detroit did you grow up in Laura???……lol

  3. Laura says:

    Richard- The Bluegrass of Kentucky actually. And had all older brothers who were avid hunters. I personally didn’t like hunting and preferred target practicing.

  4. richard says:

    Oh no….I don’t hunt. If I lived in the wilderness, maybe, but no animal killing by me.

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