Everyone needs a fleet of flying monkeys to rip the stuffing out of the annoying people in their lives
— Laura
My friend Richelle and I decided to eat at a new Vietnamese restaurant this weekend, Nether one of us had ever eaten Vietnamese food and thought it would be fun to try something new. As we walked in I immediately felt like it would be best if we left. Every patron in there was Asian ( Vietnamese I suppose) , all the staff was Asian/Vietnamese and they all turned to look at us with that look on their faces like “What the hell are these people doing in here?’
A young waiter took us to a our seats and handed us the menus. His English was real good and as we flipped through the menu he stood there ready to interpret for us. I looked up at him and asked what was the best thing on the menu and he looked at me like I was semi retarded and said slowly, “We specialize in beef dishes, that is the dishes listed under beef”. I think I kind of just nodded and said “Okay give us a few minutes.” Richelle and I looked at each other and both said ” No beef.” Because we looked under beef, and the beef was raw. Ewww. Richelle ordered a soup with shrimp, crap and squid in it, and I ordered spring rolls. Safe stuff, kind of. After we placed our order another waitress came up and speaking really slow and loud so that we could understand ” We serve chopsticks, but for you we will serve also spoon and forks.” Apparently, besides retarded non-Vietnamese not being able to use chopsticks, they also can’t have knives.
The food was meh. The funniest thing was watching Richelle take a big ole bite of squid, make a face while forcing herself to swallow and state “Me no like squid”, in a mentally challenged voice.
As we were leaving, walking to the car I had a feeling they were all looking at us out the window wondering how they could keep the riffraff out of their restaurant from now on. They definately no love us long time.
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5 Responses to Hey, don’t blame me for the napalm
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I’m laughing my ass off here.
When I was young, Asian resturants were few and far between and when we actually went to a real one we would get the same reception.
The best thing in Vietnamese place are the spring or egg rolls and a couple soups….be aware they use a lot of cilantro in the rolls.
Richard- yeah, what’s up with the reception from them? You would think money is money. And yes, they had a plate of cilatro and bean sprouts (that’s it) as a side salad. If I had a pet rabbit I would have taken it with me.
Ummmm… Why haven’t you returned calls for 3 months?
Some of them are actually open for the Chinese business and could care less about the *white* folks showing up to eat.
The food in those rare places is usually very authentic and a lot of us Americans don’t care for it as much as the dishes we get in the places that cater to us.
Gargs, when you call it’s like bedtime here, and when I can call you, you’re in a metal building!!